Thinking a lil' too much.
Monday, June 18, 2007
So here I was cruising down the road listening to some tunes. Well of course they brought back memories. It kinda got me down. The song was a puddle of mud song that I had had playing when Mike and I did our one Spanish project together. WE had had to make some sort of food and so we just got some soft taco shells and threw them into a fryer and put cinnamon and sugar one them. We were listening to the song on the way up to thirsty's where we were both working at the time. Well hearing it brought back good times like that. That and memories of me and Ron and Austin and Josh. Kinda upsetting how now I don't really want anything to do with them. All because of some stupid senior prank, well what was supposed to be a senior prank. Neither of us meant for it to go so far and now Mike and I have something I hope to never have with anyone else. So yeh I miss some good ol' days though they may have been few and far at times. Oh well, I got another job out in Silver Creek so maybe I'll make some new friends while I get my ass kicked workin' all summer.

My yearin overview
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Well here I am typing up yet another paper for English. It's actually kind of interesting and I'm enjoying looking back and trying to find things to write about. This specific entry to my senior scrap book is to be an overview of this last year. I had a decent summer so I'm going to start from the very end of last school year. I had just finished my junior year and was glad to be done and over with one more year of school. I knew that I would be working at summer recreation and shortly found out that I would be mowing my step-dad's boss' lawn as well. That was a joy, 20-30 minute bike ride uphill so that I could mow for an hour and then weed whack for 6. Summer recreation was an enjoyable job though. The children loved me and I even brought in some pokemon cards to play a couple of the participants. Mrs. Lincoln and I got along pretty well, as did I and the other staff members. Beth Moyer was working there too which surprised me a littler because I did not expect to see her there. We all had to take a CPR and First aid course but that only took a day and went by relatively quickly. Of course I visited my girlfriend over the summer but not nearly as much as I would have liked to being that I had no car and she lives 9 miles away. We're broken p now and I am dating someone else, who ironically lives above some of the recreation kids that liked me a lot. The scariest moment of my entire summer, and maybe my whole life, was this one night that I biked up to my Raechel Sikorski's house. The first time I did it I managed to hit a mailbox and now have a sweet scar by my ribs. The second, and last, time I did was a lot scarier. The ride up there was fine, however coming back two things happened that spooked me a little. First two reservation dogs gave me a little chase and stopped only when I had screamed at them from freight. The second thing was that a fog hit the fields by the road. It was really creepy and honestly scary biking down the 438 alone and in fog. My summer held other interesting pieces. For example Rob Dentice and I did the classic YMCA dance on a few street corners and by Jubilees while my brother and sister were in Maryland. I also convinced him to bu a rose and sing a sappy love song to his ex girlfriend, who I am now dating. Of course I had to go swimming. I swam with Jake and Austin and my brother which was a blast. Austin Brown actually managed to front flip off of this 10 foot wall first try into 8 foot water. By doing this he also won his soul back which he had lost the previous year in a magic card game. I had to go camping with the family every weekend of course but it wasn't unbearable. I basically just read every weekend which I love to do. As the summer dwindled gradually I had to prepare for school once again. I didn't really feel up to getting new clothes so I simply chose not to. I was excited to finally be hitting my senior year and anxious for it to be over. My mom kept telling me how important it was not to mess up in my senior year and it got a little annoying after a while. Once school got going I actually took the motive and took my road test, I passed on the first try, but barely. I was perfect calm at the start of the test. However as soon as he told me my mistake and rattled off the correction I began to get nervous. By the time I was coming around the last turn My legs and arms were shaking uncontrollably. I was surprised to learn that he passed me and could barley sign the paper due to my nervousness. Shortly after I got my license my friend quit work at the library and I took up the job. Working at the library was a pain at first because I don't enjoy doing paperwork type of things, but I got used to it quickly. Of course I was eager to get a car, so I looked and looked and found one that I liked. I think that I should have shopped more, and given another chance I would have saved my money for a little longer. But what's done is done. I got the car and am now actually in the process of painting it. But on to the rest of my year. Once school started my old buddy Ron and I started to talk more. It was good to kind of bring back an old friendship. I was excited, though I nearly never show it, that Austin was in so many of my classes. We've always had fun messing around and nobody wants their Senior year to end joyless. Well school is school, not a whole lot to say there. Sometime before Christmas I was driving in the fog to go pick up Austin. We were going to go to the library to play some cards together. I overshot is road and reversed without paying attention. Before I knew it I was in the ditch and unable to pull myself out. Since I drive a boat it was difficult to find someone to pull me out and the two people with me didn't know anyone with a truck. Becky and Ben were with me and they couldn't believe my stupidity, to this day I am still reminded of it. Finally Austin's step-dad showed up basically out of nowhere to pull me free. He was drunk and barely let me get into the car before he slammed on the gas and wrenched me out of the ditch. That night I learnt two important things. First always always check before you back up, second always use low beams in fog. Once we finally got to the library Becky's boyfriend, now ex, started asking us what took so long. We had decided to play a joke on him and lie about what took us so long. He got angry quickly and it didn't take very long before he attacked Jake Englert. Being an employee of the library I got in there and broke it up, I honestly do not remember if anyone helped me or not and if I asked the stories would all be different. Anyway I canceled the card tournament and those two were not allowed back for a few weeks. I was dating Raechel Sikorski at this time and she was furious that Becky had ridden with me to pick up and drop off Austin. That however was nowhere near the first or last time she would be jealous and that we would have rough times from it. I won't get into all of that though. Sometime in November my Senior class decided to have a 'Senior Skip Day'. The principle didn't like that too awfully much, but I had a good time. Skipped school and went up to Josh's with Austin, Ron, Shelton, and Hoca. Austin, Shelton and I left around mid-morning and stopped by Baker's house. We convinced him to tag along then went up to the old J adams building. We were gonnna walk through this trail by the tavern in Perrysburg, but instead I decided to take my big boat down the trail. It was fun off roading in my Grand Marquis and I didn't even get stuck once. On the way through the woods we were throwing around old records that I had had in my trunk from cleaning out the library basement. The greatest hit I had was this one record that flew up and landed right in a tree crotch. It was amazing, the disc was cracked but still holding steady in the tree. Once we found the right trails we got into the back building and just walked around some. The building was huge and open which was bad because of all the echoes. Three of us were going to try to get into the main building, Baker chickened out. The way we were going to take was through this service tunnel in the basement of the back building. The only problem was that the basement turned out to be flooded and the water was freezing cold. I would know being the only one willing to wade into it. A couple of workers were outside and spooked us a little bit because none of the four of us felt like getting into trouble. To avoid getting caught we went on top of an old elevator and Austin ran down to watch for the guys to leave. I know it didn't take that long, no longer than 10m minutes, but it felt a lot longer. There was no pounding heart or fierce fear of being caught. Just a general 'I hope they don't find us, but whatever'. When we finally got out of the building and back to my car a hunter was there. The man had taken my license plates number and said that he was turning me into the police to see if it was stolen or anything. He said that I was tresspassing and that I can't park my car in the woods. I was pretty nervous but that's just how I am. None of the other guys spoke up so I simply apologized and left. of course on our way out everyone of them was saying what the should have said or done. It was quite an eventful day and probably one of my most memorable. Then Christmas hit and it was the same as every year. Not a whole lot happened that I really remember. I know that my relationsip with Raechel gradually got less and less appealing to me and I broke up with her sometime in February I believe. That was a rough time for me surprisingly. I broke up with her, which lasted about a week because then I asked her back out. I drove up there at like midnight or so to ask her if she would take me back. What I recieved was a 'I was thinking about asking you out again too, but I don't think I want to.'. That wasn't all of it though. Eventually she basically said that she wanted to be friends with benefits. I actually cried on the way home that night because it felt like she had said 'I basically hate you, but if I get horny come and take care of it.'. I don't think my saddness lasted long enough honestly. Maybe I stop caring too quickly, but I moved on within the next week. I went over to Becky's that weekend I believe and I ended up getting into a lot of trouble for it, but it was worth it. Once Raechel found out she interuppted my English class crying to find out what I did and didn't do. I was basically lost on what to do about that whole episode and I basically stood there. I don't think I cared for her anymore because about 4 days earlier I had left my house at midnight to ask her back out and was solemnly rejected. Worst she said we could still be friends with benefits. I couldn't have taken that and I knew it, I think that's why I got over her extremely quickly. Now I am with Rebecca Edwards and I'm happy about it. I love being with her and we have a good time together most of the time. I am also working at thirsties now which is something I never thought I'd do. Actually I never thought I'd actually ask out becky either, but I did. In the past mponth 3 guys quit from the pizza place, thirsties, so I have had a little more work to do but it's not difficult. School's coming to a close and my mom and I have had some issues from it. All of which are my fault I suppose, but it's only a little piece of my year. My Senior year wasn't half bad considering how long it took to get to it. Now it seems like the time flew by and I find myself missing 8th grade and maybe even some of the earlier years of high school. I am ready though to leave highschool behind and carve my own path in this world.

Something odd
Monday, May 14, 2007
Something that happens as we grow up and start to work and do things on our own is that we start to realize how little we understood even months before. I can look back to the beginning of this school year alone and point out things that I did not know. Just little things and stupid stuff. For example I did not know that you are supposed to use low beams in fog. Even over a year I feel older, more knowledgeable. Perhaps it has something to do with graduating and working at thirsties. A friend and I were thinking about moving in together, now that it may actually happen it's weird. I just don't know but looking back time has gone so incredibly fast. It has slipped away like grains of sand as many older folk will tell you. I myself have a small grasp on that feeling. I feel like my freshman year was only weeks ago not years. I am glad to be moving on and to be learning about the 'real world'. However I am sad at the same time to be leaving and having to start anew.

The jump of death.
Saturday, May 12, 2007
Alright alright. No one really died so death is much too harsh of a word. However I was swimming at the wall with my brother and my girlfriend. The wall is this 10 foot drop into about 8 foot deep water down in catt creek. Well we were doing fine, but then I tried to jump close to Becky, the girlfriend, but I accidentally landed on her. It was just her leg, but still. She's a gimp now, but nothings broken. So far at least. Sorry Becky.

Why do I keep doing this?
Monday, May 07, 2007
Well I hope you sit down, read this, and just laugh your ass off. Once again John Boyer drove himself into a ditch. Yes sir now it's four times that I have had to call a friend to save my ass. This time I was dropping Mike A off at his house down Point Peter Rd. It was like 10 or so and Becky was with us. Well I dropped him off but pulling out of his driveway I totally overshot the road. Yeh I know, dumbass. I think what I did was I thought the edge of the road was the ene of his driveway when it was actually the begginning of the ditch. Well I pretty much just went forward, right into the ditch and actually made it across into the field a little bit. I guess Becky hit her head on the dash wish I'm really sorry for, but other than that neither of us were hurt. Brandon came and picked us up with Dave and then Ron pulled me out, again. It came right out though without any issues. A sherriff stopped by to see if everything was ok. The first question he had, other than who was driving, was "How in the fuck did you do that?" Yeh it was pretty sad. But I got out with Ron's help, like I said. Becky's head still hurts but I think/hope she'll be alright. Havn't checked on the car yet but I'm still driving it and it hasn't fallen apart yet. ^_^

The Best Day of my highschool career
Monday, April 30, 2007
After three years of dealing with high school I have finally come to my senior year. This is supposed to be the year that you get to relax a little more and have a lot more fun. I haven't really relaxed any, I might actually be working harder now. However I have a had a pretty good amount of fun. There will always be slow days that just drag out and pass like molases. That's when you have to do something to change things up a little bit. I did this with my friend Ron one day cause I just got tired of school. It was just a thursday so it was no big loss. But we skipped school and just went to the mall. I wasted a little more than 1/4 tank of gas, which is something I always do. Even if I shouldn't waste my gas I usually will anyway, it's a bad habbit. Anyway I instant messaged Ron and we decided to hit up the galleria. We met at Tim Horton's so that we could try to get Josh and Austin to come along. But we failed, Josh already missed too many days, and Austin just wouldn't come. Now he says that his girlfriend had said he couldn't go, but in Tim Horton's she said that she had no problem with it. So it turned out to be just me and Ron after all. We didn't really know ow to get there so we followed Austin's directions and took 39 to Springville, then took the 219 to the 90 and got of on Walden. We arrived kinda early for the mall and so we just walked around the top and bottom floor once, then went for some Mountain Dew at Target. We screwed around in target for like half an hour or so then went back to the mall and everything started opening. Of course we went into Spencer's and I let Ron smack my arm with a whip. He left some nice red marks but nothing momentous. Passing a KB Toys we had to stop and shoot some hoops on the little basketball net thing. He was just shooting alone at first then he challenged me so I joined in. For a change I actually did pretty well and beat him like 5 to 6 or something like that. Then he found this magnetic dart board in a discoveries store so we shot some darts. I was able to hold my own for a little while. But gradually my scores lowered and his got better. In the end it was my defeat. I wanted to conquer the 2 story rock wall at Dick's Sporting Goods, however it didn't open until 5 and I had to be home by 3 for work. That was a pretty big disappointment, but you can't always get what you want. I tried to convinced Ron to let me take a picture of him feeling a manacan, but he couldn't find one that he was willing to try it with because of the people nearby. Ron was in the process of looking for a new cell phone, so of course we had to stop at every booth and phone store to look at different phones. We even went into Best Buy and looked at phones. He really loves those cell phones and he wasn't sure which one he really wanted. Hell he didn't even know if he was going to stick to Verizon or switch plans. In the end he didn't buy any phone and he stuck to Verizon, but we had to have spent at least a third if not hald the time looking at hones which surprisingly wasn't too bad. We got kinda hungry so we went searching for the food court. Well I made a bet that it was one was and he said it was the other. I lost, so after I used the bathroom I had to take my two liter bottle of mountain dew between the legs. It didn't hurt nearly as much as I thought it would, but he messed up in recording it. Once we found the food court we didn't know what to get and just ended up ordering a pack or whatever from taco bell. They ripped me off of a burrito though and I will never forgive them. On our way out of the mall we got a little lost but not too bad. We hit the 219 again and got off to go into the Mckinley Mall. That mall is only about half the size of the Galleria and we didn't stay as long, but it was kinda fun too. Of course Ron had to look at more phones, but not for nearly as long. We hit Spencer's again and he go a key chain. So that was my whole day. A little over a 1/4 tank of gas and a day of school and all we got was a two liter of mountain dew, a key chain, and some not half bad memories. That was probably one of the best, if not the best, day of my high school career. There's a couple of days that may be better but this is a much easier story to tell.

The Road Ahead
Monday, April 23, 2007
The Road ahead will be choppy, bumpy, and unpaved. An unkempt unruly flop of dirt. You will need bulldozers, pick axes, shovels, and tnt. Who knows how many years it will take to clear this road ahead of me. To make it smooth and clean. The dirt will be packed down and evened out, the hills cut down and dips built up. I may never finish smoothing my road ahead but i will try as I can. Laying blacktop or cement or maybe ash fault. Hopefully my road will collide with other roads. So that we can help each other. Together we ma build a network of roads. Stronger and better built to whether the years that lay ahead. For the road ahead that we will build.

High School Never Ends
Monday, April 16, 2007

Stuck in a rut
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Yep once again I was a dumbass. Even my mom said I was a dumbass. Sun after I left work I went and picked up Becky. I drove down by the creek and went a little too far. I hit some really soft sand and burried myself in a little bit. We tried to dig out the wheel and support the tires with rocks underneath but it was to no avail. Becky helped out a lot and I was surprised she actually stayed. But we couldn't get it. So I went to her house made some calls and Josh said he'd come help me. We broke the tow rope though and had to borrow a chain from Steve. Josh was a little rough pulling me out and I thought he was gonna break my axle but he got me out and now I owe him some food. My mom was mad but she laughed about it later.

I guess you should know
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Well I might as well tell you. I broke up with Raechel and went out with Becky not long afterwords. Don't assume I broke up with Raechel for Becky because I honestly didn't. I don't know that honesty is one of my stronger points but usually I'm a decently honest guy. I have a few reasons, and some good ones, for breaking up with Raechel. But not one includes Becky. I just got over it fast and moved on. No need to mope around, waste of time.


Hello. Long time since I've been on here. I think I'll make a couple of posts just to update things a little bit, not that it'll be read. lol. Anyway the title is *_* because it represents my new girlfriend. Yes that's right, if you havn't guessed it's her stoner smily face. I love this one ^_^ and was messing with it when I found hers. I know matches her emo/stoner personality quite well. Whoever made those two keys, * _, was a genious.

Tuesday, March 06, 2007
Well I'm seriously considering moving to Jamestown with my one friend. We might get an apartment and everything. Well my mom is fliping ove it. She isn't ready for me to leave yet. I can understand. But she needs to accept it. She keeps saying that I'm not ready, and hell maybe I'm not. But I won't know unless I try right. She says that it's only an hour drive, yet she bitches all the time about her hour drive to work. Ironic.

For English
Monday, February 05, 2007
Axles turn, Wheels creak and groan, Ages shift, change and grow, Bringing new existence, New generations, Life and death, War and peace, Hatred and love, Destruction and creation, Technology and evolution, Expansion and relocation, All these things move with the wheel of time, Shift, change and grow, As do all things, On earth and in space, The similarities of the universe. This is a poem I wrote for English class. What do you guys think?

Stuck again
Sunday, February 04, 2007
Well being a skillful driver I got stuck again. Just down the road this time in a snow bank, sorta. It was pretty stupid but Ron pulled me out and all was good. I really need to be more responsible behind the wheel. In some cases anyway. But I did make it to the gas station when my needle was slightly to the left of the empty mark. That was exciting.

To long

Ah man it's been way too long since I last blogged. I've been pretty busy. Between school and my girlfriend my schedule's been consumed. Alright so I've had some time but got a little lazy too. But everyone gets that way sometimes. Plus I've had more than enough to worry about so I've been distracted. But I'll try to make a few posts today to update all the people that don't view my blog.

A Poem I Found
Monday, January 08, 2007
R.I.P., My Love by Tory Dent Let us be apart then like the panoptical chambers in IC patient X and patient Y, our names magic markered hurriedly on cardboard and taped pell-mell to the sliding glass doors, "Mary", "Donald", "Tory"; an indication that our presence there would prove beyond temporary, like snow flurry. Our health might be regained if aggressive medical action were taken, or despite these best efforts, lost like missing children in the brambles of poor fortune. The suffering of another's I can only envision through the mimesis of my own, the alarming monitor next door in lieu of a heartbeat signifying cardiac arrest, prompts a scurry of interns and nurses, their urgent footsteps to which I listen, inert and prostrate, as if subject to the ground tremors of a herd of buffalo or horses, just a blur in the parched and post-nuclear distance. I listen, perhaps the way the wounded will listen to the continuing war, so different sounding than before, the assault of noise now deflected against consciousness rather than serving as motivation for patriotism and targets. Like fistfuls of dirt loaded with pebbles and rocks thrown at my front door, I knew that the footsteps would soon be running to me also. The blood pressure cuff swaddled around my arm pumped in its diastolic state independently like an iced organ ready for transplant as I witnessed with one circular rove of my eyes my body now dissected into television sets, like one of those asymmetrical structures that serves as a model for a molecular unity in elementary science classes. And the plastic bags of IV fluids that hung above me, a Miró-like mobile or iconic toy for an infant's amusement, measured the passing of time by virtue of their depletion. Sometimes I could count almost five and then seven swinging vaguely above me at 4 am. I remember the first, hand-held high above me when I arrived via ambulance at the ER, the gurney accelerating as a voice exclaims on the color of my hands "they're blue!". Another voice (deeper) virtually yells out into the chaos that she can't get a pulse. Several pairs of scissors begin simultaneously to cut off my clothes, their shears working their way upward like army ants from pant cuff and shirt-sleeve, a formulaic move for the ER staff which, despite its routine, still retains a sense of impromptu in the hurriedness of the cutting both deft and crude, in the sound of their increased breathing, of their efforts intensified by my blood pressure dropping, the numbers shouted out as if into night fog and ocean. It's not a lack of professionalism but the wager of emotional investment that I feel. One attendant, losing her aplomb for a moment, can't contain herself from remarking (as if I'm already post-mortem) on what a great bra I have; "Stretch lace demi-cup, Victoria's Secret," I respond politely in my head. In turn, when they put the oxygen tube into my nose I thought immediately of Ali McGraw on her death bed in Love Story and how good she looked in one. And then the catheter where I pissed continually into a bottle like a paraplegic let me in on the male fear of castration my focus centered entirely on that tube, its vulnerable rigging which I held onto tenderly throughout the night like something dying against my thigh or something birthing. I held on though the IV in my forearm overextended with a kind of pleading, the needle hooked deep into a mainstream vein the way in deep sea fishing lines are cast into the darkest water, my body thrashing about in the riverweed of its fluids. The translucent infrastructure of IVs and oxygen tubes superimposed itself upon me like a body double, more virulent and cold, like Leda pinned and broken by her swan, like the abandoned and organ-failed regarding its superior soul ascend. So completely and successfully reconfigured within its technological construct my body proper no longer existed, my vital signs highlighted in neon preceded the spiraling vortex of my interiority, the part of me people will say later that that's what they loved when they roam about in the cramped rare book library of their memory for a couple of minutes and think of "Tory". Movement can only be accounted in shadows, Virilio informs us, the reconciliation of oneself in one's disappearance. An anachronistic sundial, I turn my profile and the fluorescence falls unfractured, unmediated onto the postmodern tenebrism of absence against absence, my quickened inhalations against my backless gown. My love for you, my love, for my friends, untethers and floats, snaps apart and off me like the I.V. tubes and monitor wires the flailed arms of an octopus unfolding without gravity, as I reach up in a Frankensteinian effort to shut off my monitors, the constant alarming of the human prototype my own body keeps rejecting, while death moves closer, a benign presence. It stands respectfully just outside the perimeters of my life and adjusts itself the way the supervising nurse did the monitor perimeters to suit my declining vital signs so I could get some sleep. I felt a relationship with death, a communication, it was more familiar than I ever imagined, what I had always returned to as the sign of me, the self we attribute to the mysterious and perfectly ordered Romantic notion of origin. What I'm trying to say is that it was not foreign. It was not foreign, but it was not a homecoming either. There was no god, no other land, no beyond; no amber, no amethyst, no avatar. But there was a suspension, there was an adieu to recognition to the shoes of those I love, like Van Gogh's, a pair but alone the voices of loved ones, their tones, their intonations, like circulation, closed-circuited but effective. There was a listless but clear-thinking comfort that into my own eyes I would go, although not "into" in the Bachelardian sense which implies diminishment; there was none of that. It was just the opposite: expansion but without a pioneer's vision. What we regard as the "self" extended itself, but I wouldn't say in a winged way, over the Bosch-like landscape of brutal interactions and physical pain and car alarms and the eternal drilling of disappointment the exigent descendence of everyday that everyday you peer down or up its daunting staircase, nauseous with vertigo gathering like straw the rudimentary characteristics of courage, gumption, innovation and faking it to the hilt like a hilarious onslaught of sham orgasms. Transcendence might be the term Emerson would lend it. What I'm trying to say is that it wasn't lonely.

Graveside Trend

Saddam was wearing body-shaping pantyhose during the casually planned execution. Sexy shiite lawmakers declined tossed Sunni and designer tights. Mahmoud created blogs to accommodate national reconciliation. The industry makers guard sickly orange leaders West of Baghdad, getting space on floors.

To be an officer.
Sunday, January 07, 2007
I think that I could kill a man. I doubt that I would tear up but I'm sure the first time would be a little tough. When you're soldier though it's a life or death situation which may make things easier at the time. I'm pretty good at ignoring certain emotions and what not so that's why I think I'd be able to kill a man. I only mean this in tearms of the military and war. But I would find being an officer very distasteful. First I think I am far too reserved to be one. Second putting my own life in danger is one thing but to order a bunch of men to their possible deaths and to tell them that they have to kill or be killed. I wouldn't like that at all. Why should I have the power to order them to do such things? Why should anyone have that power?

All pro my senior year
Saturday, January 06, 2007
Ok so I'm not a horrible driver. But I'm not great either. Plus I'm really bad at night. Friday night I went to pick up my friend Austin. My friends Ben and Becky went with me. It's dark foggy and he lives on back roads. This was the first time I ever drove it myself. Anyway I overshot his road. Backed up, and hit a ditch. I'm probably the luckiest son of a bitch out there. Well maybe not, no I am. I have a great girlfriend and my car is still alive. Anyway I called Austin and he jumped in his ma's car to come check it out. We flagged a guy down since Austin's truck is off the road but he didn't have chains. So Austin ran back to his house for some. He couldn't find them so the guy left. Well then David B. came by in a nice big truck. He even had chains. Austin hooked me up then his step dad comes down and just yanks me right out. I wasn't even ready. But he got me out, no problem. The car isn't even dammaged. I'm so lucky. It's the biggest ditch on the road I guess. So yeh that is why I am so lucky. Jealous aren't you?

I'm a green, she's an orange.
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
Alright so my psychology class and all the freshman took this personality test called "true colors". It was pretty acurate I would say, though of course not 100 %. But I am green, which describes me pretty well. The love of my life is an orange, which I have ot say does her justice. If you look at it right then they actually go together well. I'm her reality and limit setter and she's my fun and smiles. It's actually really awsome.

The Earth Is Melting, We're all going to die.

Yes that's right I admitted it. The Earth is warming up and the weather is going to go CRAZY!! It'll probably be towards the end of my lifetime (so my dad says) but still I think it's going to happen. The ice caps are melting, all the fresh water is going to terrorise the sea. But that's what humanity gets for trying to impose itself upon the entire world and rule as the superior being. SO there you have it. We are all going to die, if not naturally then this part of reality will probably do the job.

A new years reflection and prediction.
Tuesday, January 02, 2007
For my English class I have to write about this past year and my expectations for this next year. Well this last year wasn't half bad I suppose. The year went by at a pretty fast rate and it even held a few surprises. I went all over the place on my bike this summer. Cross-countried it to California and back. Ha, I’m just messing with you. But I did do a lot of biking. The year held a good bit of emotional roller coasters for me though that’s for sure. Hopefully this next year will spare me all the hell of emotions but I doubt that it will. I started driving this year so that’s pretty exciting I guess. I’m going to start going to college this year but I don’t think I am gong to move out. Though I can’t say I don’t want to. Anyway I’m sure the new year will also hold many great and horrible surprises for me before I reach the end of it.

The world does not exist.
Monday, January 01, 2007
Ok so maybe it does and maybe it doesn't. Everyone here. The people that we know, the people we think we know, and the people we don't. What if we're all just non-existant. We could all just be some guy's dream. A friend said that once. I think about it sometimes. It's kind of creepy to think that none of us might exist. It could all just be something's dream. You never know.

A New Years to remember

Well New Years Eve started out pretty crudy actually. I got mad at Raechel for something she said and hung up on her. Now she's probably mad at me. I made it worst by sending her a message about it and not calling back to apologize. I don't think I should though so.. Anyway later on Jake came over and Brandon had Rebecca C. down. It was pretty fun I guess. We all screamed for the new year. It was nice to forget about everything for a while. I had a saliva war with Rebecca which was interesting. But that was about it.

I always tell myself stuff.
Thursday, December 28, 2006
Something that I do alot is I tell myself what is. I think a lot af the reason that I am the way I am is because my mom didn't really want me to grow up. So instead of calling me a young adult or a teen ager she would always call me a child. I think I'll always be just a kid in her eyes, but still. I don't know it's confusing. But basically I just don't like it. It used to make me feel a lot less than I was, in age and maturity. At least she doesn't say it anymore, not for a while at least, but I know she still thinks it.


I think I'm just a little bit ungrateful of a few things. The biggest one is probably the time I spend with Raechel. I always want more and I seldom apreciate what time we do spend together. I take it offensively sometimes when she wants time with out me. Then at the same time I sometimes want time without her as well. It's all quite time consuming and stressful I think sometimes. Ha what do I know? I'm just a kid, right?

The things that could have been.

Have you ever taken a few minutes out of your day to think about all of the decisions you've made? Or about how a little difference in those decisions could probably turn your entire world upside down. It's crazy how if one thing was done differently what would be different for the future. Say for example if Rome hadn't become corrupt and hadn't tried to expand so far. Would it still be a superpower? It all starts though with a couple of choices, they really do affect our entire lives. Each little choice plays it's own role. It's pretty cool to think about.

The Conqueror of Shamballa
Monday, December 25, 2006
If you watch Fullmetal Alchemist then you'e probably heard of this movie. It's a fantastic anime movie!! I've wanted to see it for a while and my mom got it for me for Christmas. It's so great, I actually teared up more than a couple of time because of this movie. It was such a great extension of the series. I loved the series a lot and I followed it to the end so I knew what everything was about. Even if you hadn't seen the series I think it would be a good movie. Overall I think that is the best movie I have ever seen!

Christmas Eve with the one I love
Sunday, December 24, 2006
Today was made about a thousand times better than any Christmas eve has ever been for me. Even without the snow I still go to go up and see Raechel. It's great to be driving. I LOVE HER SO MUCH!! Spending time with her is so great. I hope that I always feel this way!! Too much may burn me out but I don't care. It'd be more than worth it!!

New Wallet Edition

Today the person who I love half to death and twice over and I exchanged Christams gifts. It was pretty fun for just exchanging gifts. I love spending time with her tough and that made it a lot better. Anyway she gave me this Kakashi patch as one of my gifts. Well I ironed it onto my wallet and it's friggin great!! Yes that's all this entire post was about. ^_^